“Rang chapi zam lay rang ma thai.”
[One could not cross a bridge constructed by oneself.]
Bhutanese Proverb
[No. 76]
SOMETIMES WE FORGET THAT EVEN CHANGE THAT WE’D CALL AN IMPROVEMENT COMES WITH TRADEOFFS. WHAT DO YOU WANT TO IMPROVE NEXT ABOUT YOUR LIFE? NOW, DESCRIBE WHAT’S AT STAKE IF YOU DO SO.
Some summits feel impossibly high. I like this question and yet, it feels particularly vulnerable to approach. It stirs me. I have been feeling a brewing desire to be, of all things, quiet.
To say less, to listen more.
When I told my partner Nico this, he chuckled.
[You?]
He knows me well, as I have spent years leading with words. The truth is I would prefer to have these chats with you face-to-face with a glass of Lambrusco in hand. However, we stepped into something abstract and post-human together, and now more than ever, I desire to wrap our precious collective Alien baby in a warm towel rather than wash her away with the bathwater of my own tides.
Furthermore, I believe in why I started this dialogue with you. I believe in us.
Altar at the entrance to Tiger’s Nest in Paro, Bhutan
I spent last September in Bhutan, graced with a first-look at a culture of hyper-presence. Something softened, opened, eased. There was less to prove. I trusted more. I slowed down. I listened more intently, as I had observed the Monpa people do during our precious time together. Mother Nature, rather than a device, wakes them up in the morning and guides their days.
Since, I have connected more with my heart and less with my mind, dismissing the part of my brain that ruled for decades with its expectations and agendas for what was next. My core relationships have blossomed with less effort and more grace. The contrast of these openings to the world’s tenor at times has felt jarring. How have we collectively moved so far away from love, connection, conversation in so many corridors? How have we forgotten how much we can change in our own homes and communities? That it starts somewhere…everywhere…
Then, in April, I went back to Bhutan.
I learned to savor love and beauty yet again, and to be of deeper service.
To the world. To my family. To you.
When I birthed My Beautiful Alien, the intention was to invite us all into a conversation around the questions and topics we often shy away from discussing. My vision was for us to dialogue towards communal growth and evolution. How do we listen our way into a liberated future? As I digest being so far away and the other things crackling in my very real life, what I long for from this point forward is to hear other voices, to invite you into greater engagement. [THE WORLD IS ASKING FOR US].
My block, when it came to this project, transmuted into a desire or call to make it more communal. So, what will that look like? I have invited a group of bright thinkers to help me get to No. 99. Then, the project will evolve into a tarot-style deck to inspire your own dinner parties [plus we’ll invite you to a few of ours].
I want to listen to these brave conversations in real life, within and with one another. I know that together we have planted seeds that we will till in the coming years, in a whole-hearted effort to cultivate a society we are happy to inhabit and to leave for our children and our children’s children. I am excited to share this conversation with you and to walk each other home.
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Twice in the last 6 months, I have climbed up to Tiger’s Nest. As you trek up the mountain, the trail gains 1699 feet in elevation and eventually unclasps you in a stunning set of temples carved in rock, eons above sea level. It is challenging, at times brutal. Both trips, however, I made it, one small step at a time. Walking back, of course, comes relatively easier. Hikers who’d gotten a later start would inquire enviously, breathlessly, “How much longer to the top?”
Each occasion this happened, I replied, “You are well on your way, and I promise it’s worth it.”